Magazine

  • Beach Frog Will Not Rebrand as Denny’s, actually

    Beach Frog Will Not Rebrand as Denny’s, actually

    The iconic Beach Frog lashed out at Nosara Lately today, saying that “there is no chance in hell”  that The Frog will be rebranded as a Denny’s restaurant. Threatening that their Dad would beat us up if we didn’t take it all back, they told us to retract our story  –  because you know,  Everyone

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  • Black Box Rebrands to Pink Box

    Black Box Rebrands to Pink Box

    The residents of North Guiones awoke yesterday morning to find their beloved local high-end 4×4 dealership, Black Box transformed into Pink Box – the luxury sex toy and vagina-scented candle boutique that North Guiones has long been demanding. Few imagined that it would be Gwyneth Paltrow herself who would answer their calls. Gwyneth Paltrow herself

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  • Headshop Lawyer Adds “5-Minute Divorce”

    Headshop Lawyer Adds “5-Minute Divorce”

    Headshop Lawyer – top-rated locally on TripAdvisor for immigration papers, smoking accessories, and Delta 9 gummies – has now added a “5 Minute Express Divorce” package to her deep bench of legal and smoke-related products, noting that the “5 minutes” applies to qualified clients only. “That’s pretty much anyone who is building a house in

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  • Lobo To Lead Redesign of Alex’s Fish Market

    Lobo To Lead Redesign of Alex’s Fish Market

    Highly regarded Nosara design firm Lobo confirmed today that they have been chosen for the prestigious redesign of Alex’s Fish Market, one of the most beloved and authentic landmarks in Garza – and soon to be the only remaining authentic spot in Garza. As Nosara Lately reported last week, the recent Outpost Nosara purchase of

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  • Consumer Report: The Latrisha Yoni Steam Temple

    Consumer Report: The Latrisha Yoni Steam Temple

    I have to be honest with my readers. When told I was being sent out to test Latishas Yoni Steam Temple, Nosara’s ultimate Yoni experience – my emotions were mixed. As a Paltrow-certified Yoni Steam Practitioner myself, I looked forward to an impartial, professional reconnaissance. But as a sexually evolved woman with a deep appreciation

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  • Shanti Moonwater Special Report: Tuk-Tuk Hunk

    Shanti Moonwater Special Report: Tuk-Tuk Hunk

    By now, everybody knows who Tuk-Tuk Hunk is. I had been seeing him for months. At La bomba. At the Main entrance. Heading up the hill into Las Huacas. No tank top. His chest professionally oiled, forever just coming from a photoshoot – or – A Tuk-Tuk Hunk booking. On Tuk-Tuk-Hunk.com, his boyish looks and

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  • K-Section Gem: 25 Beds, 1 Toilet, No Shower

    K-Section Gem: 25 Beds, 1 Toilet, No Shower

    Pressured by Del Mar tuitions, truck payments, and rising poke prices, local realtors have been scrambling to find new income streams to tide them over until 2036, when JD Vance will finish his second term and the local real estate market is expected to finally bounce back. Leading the way – as usual – is

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  • NCA seeks to impose vegen menu option at all area chicharrones stands

    NCA seeks to impose vegen menu option at all area chicharrones stands

    Local Nosarans awoke today to the unexpected news that the Nosara Conservation Association (NCA) has expanded its range of authority to local chicharrónes stands.  A new directive spells out in no uncertain terms that vegan options will be required. Worried locals tell Nosara Lately that the newly mandated vegan options will probably spell the end

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  • White Palms to become even more upscale and exclusive

    White Palms to become even more upscale and exclusive

    White Palms will begin construction next week of an experimental holographic jungle barrier that will completely conceal the upscale hotel. “You will really have to be in the know,” said managing director Giselle Cruz Peña. “The technology has finally caught up with our marketing strategy.” For several years now, White Palms has led the trend

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