Local News

  • ‘Del Mar Mom’ Brings Surge Pricing to Nosara

    ‘Del Mar Mom’ Brings Surge Pricing to Nosara

    Del Mar Mom – a surge pricing app for local tuk-tuk drivers and cleaning ladies launched two weeks ago on the App Store –  and has absolutely caught fire locally, with nearly eighty percent of all local Tuk-Tuk drivers and cleaning ladies reporting that they use the app daily. During yesterday’s torrential rains and flooding,

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  • Local surf school succeeds in branding over 90% of recent 6-day school

    Local surf school succeeds in branding over 90% of recent 6-day school

    The champagne was flowing when Nosara Lately visited Thoughtful Surfing, the local surf school for thoughtful surfers. A true milestone had been reached: Thoughtful Surfing had succeeded in branding just over 90% of a recent 6-day surf school. “It’s just amazing,” gushed owner Carol Lee Turner.  “The Instagram content from the school actually exceeded the

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  • Bondi Targets Nosara in Press Conference

    Bondi Targets Nosara in Press Conference

    In a bizarre turn of events at a Washington DC press conference yesterday, strangely hot MAGA chick and US Attorney General Pamela Bondi listed Nosara – along with Chicago, Portland, Los Angeles, and 15 other cities –  as an Out of Control Hellhole where People Eat Dogs. (OCHPED) The OCHPED designation is significant: so far,

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  • Dueling Gondolas: Casa Vitality Strikes Back

    Dueling Gondolas: Casa Vitality Strikes Back

    Shockwaves rolled through the Nosara community yesterday when the news emerged that Casa Vitality is now backing an alternative Gondola plan that omits Bodhi Tree altogether. Local business heavyweights El Chivo, Howlers, and Olo Alaia  have all thrown their weight behind the new proposal from Casa Vitality, pledging to build the necessary mid-stations that will

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  • Poor water quality at Bakers linked to longboard wax

    Poor water quality at Bakers linked to longboard wax

    A troubling new twist in the Baker Beach water quality saga took place today when the Nosara Conservation Association (NCA) revealed in a press conference that longboard wax has been determined to be the main cause of pollution in the ocean off Bakers. This startling development upends over a decade of established local wisdom that

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  • Outpost Nosara launches ‘Outpost Basic’

    Outpost Nosara launches ‘Outpost Basic’

    Outpost Nosara announced yesterday the launch of ‘Outpost Basic’, a stripped-down alternative for remote workers who don’t require air conditioning or stable internet. At a mere $4k annual membership fee, the new offering features dedicated barstools at La Ventanita with wifi coming from across the street. Early users have described the wi-fi signal as “pretty

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  • ICE to withdraw completely from Guanacaste

    ICE to withdraw completely from Guanacaste

    Nosara Lately has learned from well-placed sources that ICE is planning to cease all operations and withdraw completely from Guanacaste. “It’s a hellhole,” said one senior management figure. “I don’t know how we ever got into this place. It’s like Afghanistan.But worse.” Many ICE employees in Guanacaste have not seen their families since the rains

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  • Texas National Guard Deploys to Esperanza

    Texas National Guard Deploys to Esperanza

    Esperanza residents awoke this morning to find a full pocket battalion of the Texas National Guard – including nearly 30 Humvees, ARADS, and Light Assault Vehicles – deployed in tactical formation in the parking lot of beloved local supermarket El Favorito. Khaki-clad soldiers had established a loose perimeter along the national road, and area residents

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  • Catastrophic Decline: Only 400 DJs Left in Nosara

    Catastrophic Decline: Only 400 DJs Left in Nosara

    The United Nations Subcommittee on Indigenous Cultures voted in a special emergency session yesterday to add the last 400 DJs in Nosara to the UN Watchlist of Endangered Native Populations, saying at a press conference that Nosara’s once-thriving DJ population “is under attack from all sides.” The sale of Perozah in Garza – a hallowed

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