White Palms will begin construction next week of an experimental holographic jungle barrier that will completely conceal the upscale hotel. “You will really have to be in the know,” said managing director Giselle Cruz Peña. “The technology has finally caught up with our marketing strategy.”

For several years now, White Palms has led the trend towards high-end dining experiences, in which no single menu item can have fewer than eight words and three passive tense verbs. Other Nosara area restaurants have struggled to keep up. “They are tough to compete with,” confessed the owner of a local chicharrones stand. Once you use the word ‘chicharonnes’ on a menu, there’s just not that much room to work with, space-wise.”

Local K-Section residents are generally positive about the announcement. Some see darker forces at play. One man muttered, “Everyone thinks Marlin Bills went out of business. But my guess is they got ahold of this holographic thing first. I mean, has anyone actually been in that new dentist’s office? Doesn’t it seem kinda sus? “